I Blog For Books

20 January 2009

Empty

The anxiety comes in waves, threatening to drown me if I so much as open my mouth. It's midterm time, and I feel so unprepared. It seems as if every day brings a new assignment to pile atop the others I've not yet finished. Why am I not utilizing the abilities that I know I possess? (written 9 Oct 07)

The past few days have been nerve-racking. For some reason, I have not managed to yet organize school the way I need to be organized. I need to have a system put in place so that I don't "forget" important assignments, to make sure that I am allocating time to study and review the materials that I have to know. Since Sunday, I've been reviewing material for a midterm ... only to find that the test is not until next week! I wasted valuable time last night reviewing and writing notes for something that I have seven more days to study! This is not at all like me. Where do I find the fix?

When it seems as if there are not enough hours in the day, what do you do? Prioritize. I know all the buzzwords, know all the tricks. Why am I not applying them?? More than anything, I need to sit down (or kneel down) and have a serious talk! I know that I am more than capable of handling this if I ask God to help me and trust in Him to do so. I've said it before, and probably will say it again many more times before my life here is done ... I cannot do it alone. If I ask God for help in prioritizing ... putting the big rocks first ... my schedule will have a smoother flow.
God, help me see that you are the only way. Lay your hand on my shoulder and let your love light my path. Show me, once more, your mercy. May I never be too busy to thank you for your incredible patience and love.

"Your heavenly Father already knows all your needs, and he will give you all you need from day to day if you live for him and make the Kingdom of God your primary concern. So don't worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today's trouble is enough for today." ~Matthew 6:32-34 NLT

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