I Blog For Books

19 January 2009

Starting Over

How many times in our lives have we said "I'm going to ... " Go ahead. Fill in the blank with whatever it is (or was) that you promised yourself you were going to do THIS time. Well, as most of those who know me have learned, THIS time, I actually did it. I'm now "officially" a full-time college student. Again. (written 21 Aug 07)

2006 was quite a tumultuous year for me. It started off rather well, or so I thought, life was continuing on in its rather predictable way ... get up and go to work, come home, do a bit of housework, interact with the kids, go to bed, get up the next day and do it all over again. Very early in the year, there was a large implosion, if you will, at my job. We lost a general manager, and about 15 hourly employees for various and sundry "violations." Seemingly shaking it off, we moved on.

Late spring, I received the news from my oldest that I was going to be a grandma! After the shock wore off (I'm far too young, I thought!), I embraced the idea with a growing passion, happily sharing the impending news with anyone who wanted to listen (and probably some who didn't). About midway through the year, my own personal implosion occurred ... and it was quite the explosion!! After giving six years of my life to this company, I was suddenly unemployed. Not completely unemployed, because I'd taken a part time job earlier in the year to help fund the trip to Germany (now rescheduled to coincide with the birth of my grandchild). The difference in my work schedule was drastic, and the funds, of course, decreased accordingly.

Fortunately for me, I was not unemployed for long. Diligent searching for employment, coupled with many hours of soul searching, led me to turn down an offer of the same type of job I'd just left. Don't misunderstand me ... the money would have been the same if not better! It was the stress, the "overload", the total life consumption that I could no longer stand. Factor in the two teenagers at home and it was neither feasible nor desirable for me to give up so much of my life for something I no longer enjoyed. The job I accepted, while paying me FAR less, has given me much more in return!

I now truly enjoy going to work. I love what I do, and the people that I am fortunate enough to be able to help every day. This, in turn, caused another round of soul searching on my part. For the first time in a very long time, I was turning to prayer regularly. Not the "Oh God, just let me make it through this day" that I had playing through my mind on a constant basis before; but actually talking to God, telling Him of my concerns, asking Him questions. Yes, He DOES answer.

That's why I am where I am today: sitting in the LRC at Wallace, on my second day of school. As I write this, I've printed the materials I need for class today, and am waiting for class to start.
After weeks of talking about it, researching the funding, and questioning my ability, I bit the bullet and enrolled in classes for the fall term. My goal? To become a registered nurse, hopefully starting the nursing program Fall 2008. Not being one to do things by half measures, I am taking 13 credit hours this term (in addition to working full-time and part-time). That's nothing exceptional ... people do it every day. My drive to excel and to change my life direction fulfills a need deep within me. With God as my guide, I cannot fail. I am thankful that He has guided me this far, and that He will be with me always. This peace, this peace-of-mind, cannot be bought ... it is yours for the asking, absolutely free.

"For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten son, that whosoever believeth in Him shall not perish, but have everlasting life." ~John 3:16 KJV

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